Cheating – love or lust?

 
 Does it count as cheating if you make out with someone whose name you don’t know, while you’re drunk? Does it count as cheating if you make out with your best friend? Does it count as cheating if you kiss a girl while your boyfriend is in the next room, or if you think of your girlfriend’s best friend while masturbating?
 What exactly does count as cheating? And who decided that it does?


 My opinion… To cheat means something more than lust, something more than a pure physical act. To cheat is to lie. Simple. To cheat is to say “I love you” when you don’t mean it, to say “I care about you” when you wish you’d be saying it to someone else. To cheat is to lie in your bed, hugging her, “the love of your life”, holding her tight, and to think of someone else. To cheat is to wake up thinking of her best friends, to go to bed thinking of someone you can’t have. 

 Relationship are based on love. Why can’t cheating be? Why is it that if I kiss a girl, just a kiss, just cause I wanted to kiss someone and you weren’t there, I am a cheater, but if I love a girl, and I’m ready to give my whole heart and soul to her instead of you, but I’ve never even touched her, I’m not? 


 I was sitting with two friends today. One of them has a boyfriend. She loves him. However, she kissed a girl last week. Just made out. The other one, she has a boyfriend too. She loves him. She said she loves a girl too. She can love both, she said. 

 And this is what I don’t get. How come everyone in the room thought the first one is a cheater? Even though she only kissed the girl cause she liked her, cause she wanted to kiss someone, cause maybe it was nice. And how come noone in the room even thought that what the other one said is really what relationship is about?!? She LOVES someone else. She doesn’t make out with somebody else, true, she doesn’t sleep with her, true, but she THINKS about her, she probably DREAMS about her, she probably wishes she was holding her while holding him.  
 Just… Just try to get in those guys’ shoes. What would hurt you more? To find out she kissed someone else or to find out she loves someone else? 


 
 I’ve spoken about this with so many friends. I know, my definition of cheating is not… Not what fits in everyone’s mind. But I know, if I love her, I could forgive a kiss. I could forgive sex. I would forgive sex. I could never forgive loving someone else. It’s… A kiss would hurt my pride. A love would hurt my feelings. See the difference?


 I’ve only been “cheated on” once. Well, once that I know of. So maybe I’m not the one to talk. But I’ve “cheated” a lot. And I have been the one they’ve “cheated” with. And I only felt bad once. Just once. When I knew she loved me, and not her.